


Panic

by GuineverePendragon



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Panic Attack, VidCon, not necessarily slash, vidcon panel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-10
Updated: 2016-07-10
Packaged: 2018-07-22 16:40:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7446274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GuineverePendragon/pseuds/GuineverePendragon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>While onstage at Vidcon, Dan suffers from a panic attack. Only Phil knows how to calm him down- except, Phil's across the venue doing a whole different panel.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Panic

It all happened quite suddenly.  
Dan Howell was walking down the VidCon hallway with Cat, Alfie, Zoe, Louise, and Tyler. The six of them had just finished an intense card game in Alfie and Zoe’s hotel room, and were currently heading to one of the most anticipated panels of the day.  
The absence of Phil had been noted throughout the game by everyone.  
“He’s doing a panel about the beginning of YouTube,” Dan had explained to everyone. “Only a few youtubers from the early years were invited. Apparently none of us are vintage enough for their likings.”  
So Dan had been left alone with his friends, something that he felt quite comfortable with. Dan may enjoy spend most of his time with Phil, but even he had to admit that sometimes spending time with other people alone was refreshing.  
An easy conversation was being held among the YouTube friends.  
“There’s no way that Joey is moving to London,” Zoe argued with a laugh. “He loves the sun too much.”  
“That boy is as American as it gets,” Cat agreed.  
“Fine, fine,” Alfie conceded.  
“Oof, I’m actually feeling a little bit nervous for this panel,” Louise admitted from beside Dan.  
“Really? What for?” Dan asked.  
“This crowd is supposed to be huge!” Louise exclaimed. “I mean, all of those people are counting on us to entertain them for an hour. I’m not that funny guys.”  
“We’ll be great,” Tyler responded. “Besides, at this point the subscribers just want to see us. Whether or not we’re funny is only half the problem.”  
The group continued to laugh and smile, with the exception of Dan. The British youtuber wouldn’t admit it in front of his friends, but large crowds often gave him major anxiety.  
Dan struggled with anxiety from a young age. He was perfectly fine reciting lines for a play, but once his own thoughts had to be projected his stomach would knot.  
Dan didn’t mind doing a small panel so much, as he found it a lot easier to have casual conversations with the other panel members and a smaller crowd.  
This panel was also more intimidating because Phil would not be joining it until about halfway through. The older youtuber had a second panel that conflicted with the bigger one, and Phil being the kind person he is decided to go to both rather than skip out on one.  
Phil was someone that Dan could count on to continue his thoughts, and vice versa. Dan was close with the other youtubers, but they didn’t always understand Dan’s point of view like Phil.  
Overall, the prospect of this panel was beginning to make Dan feel much more nervous than he was a few minutes ago.  
The group reached the backstage area of the panel and were quickly run through where the cameras would be and how the stage would be situated. Each youtuber was given a microphone, and Dan accepted his with a shaky hand. The stage attendant eyed him warily, but a smile from Dan was apparently convincing enough.  
“Alright, the panel starts in 10 minutes everyone,” A loud voice boomed over a loudspeaker.  
Dan situated himself over by the water cooler, downing a cup quickly. He could hear the crowd buzzing with excitement, a few enthusiastic girls yelling out names, including his own.  
Dan’s heart began racing, and his breaths became shorter. He was considering dropping the panel, but before he could say anything, Dan was being ushered up the steps and onto the stage. Dan threw on a classic smile and waved a few times to the crowd. His vision was blurry, so he found himself staring at Louise’s bright blonde hair in order to find his seat.  
Just half an hour until Phil is here, Dan said in his mind. The first ten minutes of the panel went by rather smoothly. Dan was quieter than usual, but managed to throw in an occasional opinion and laughed at the right times. However, things quickly descended.  
Dan had a habit of subconsciously forgetting to eat when he was nervous, and today was no exception. The lack of food paired with the rush of adrenaline was quickly taking over him. Dan’s vision blurred again, and the buzz of noise from the crowd was quickly fading. Dan blinked unhelpfully a few times. He could feel his heart rate slowing down, and his breaths became short and staccato.  
Louise, sat next to Dan, was the first to take note in this change. She notice his breaths were uneven, and his eyes seem fixated on the floor.  
“Dan, are you okay?” She whispered.  
Dan managed a nod, though it was unconvincing.  
“Do you need to leave?” She asked.  
Dan looked at Louise, and she saw the fear in his eyes straight on. Decided that Dan was not well enough to continue, Louise subtly elbowed Cat.  
“Dan’s taken ill,” Louise whispered, hoping that the audience was too fixated on Alfie’s response to a question to notice Dan.  
“How bad?” Cat asked quietly. Louise leaned back so that Cat could see Dan’s worsening condition.  
“Pretty bad,” Louise stated.  
“I’ve seen this before,” Cat whispered. “He’s having a panic attack. He had one before the Summer in the City thing that he and Phil did.”  
“How did he get over it?”  
“I’m not sure, Phil said something to him to calm him down,” Cat responded. “But right now he needs to lie down somewhere. Let’s get him off the stage.”  
Louise nodded. Into the microphone, she said, “Sorry guys, I just remembered, Dan, Cat and I need to be somewhere. It’s really important, I’m so sorry!”  
Luckily, the crowd only “awe”d and clapped supportively. Louise stood up with Cat, and walked over to Dan. Louise grabbed one of Dan’s arms, with Cat grabbing the other.  
The crowd began shouting questions as to why Dan needed so much support to walk, but Louise and Cat were quick to haul Dan off of the stage.  
“What’s going on?” Hank, who was managing the TVs backstage, asked.  
“Dan’s having a panic attack,” Cat said. “He needs to lie down.”  
Hank nodded and led the girls through the backstage area and into the youtuber hangout room, which was unfortunately rather occupied at the moment.  
Having no other choice, Louise and Cat put Dan down onto the nearest couch. The 24 year old’s breathing only got worse in that moment, and he started making choking sounds.  
“I’m going to call the onsite paramedics,” Hank said. “Can you two help him while I’m gone?”  
“Yeah, yeah,” Cat promised. Hank ran off to find a phone.  
“What do we do?!” Louise asked, terrified by Dan’s condition. The 10 or so other youtubers in the room took notice of the scene and came closer.  
“Where’s Phil?” Cat asked the small crowd.  
“He’s still on the other panel,” Jim said.  
“Jim, go get him. Tell him what’s going on, hurry!” Louise exclaimed. Jim nodded and quickly left the room.  
Cat kneeled beside Dan.  
“Phil is on the way, Dan, you’re going to be okay,” She said calmly. Dan didn’t seem to hear her. His eyes were forced shut, and tears were steadily rolling down his face.  
“Can you guys back up a bit?” Louise yelled angrily at the crowd of youtubers who were still surrounding them. They quickly obliged.  
A few minutes passed, though they felt like hours to everyone in the colorfully lit room. Finally, the doors were thrown open. Jim ran inside, trailed closely by a startled Phil.  
“Oh thank goodness,” Louise breathed, moving away from Dan so that Phil could kneel beside the couch.  
“Dan,” Phil whispered quietly. “Dan, it’s me.”  
Dan reached out a hand and grabbed onto Phil’s arm. Phil took Dan’s hand in his own and traced a circular pattern repeatedly.  
“Dan, you’re backstage right now. You’re in the hangout room, with the cool lights. Remember? Just yesterday you told me how cool it was,” Phil talked in a calm, quiet voice. Dan’s breathing evened out, much to everyone’s relief.  
Phil then leaned in closer to Dan and started muttering inaudible things into his ear. Louise and Cat glanced at each other.  
Dan stopped shaking, and he took deep breaths. Phil placed Dan’s hand back onto the couch and took a seat by Dan’s head. Phil helped Dan, with his eyes still closed, sit up. Tears were still falling from Dan’s eyes, and Phil pulled Dan back so that his legs were draped over Phil’s lap. Phil wrapped his arms around Dan’s torso, and Dan buried his face into Phil’s neck.  
The embrace reminded Louise of how she would comfort Darcy after the little girl suffered from a nightmare. It had a similar effect too, as Dan seemed to calm down just as Darcy often did in her mother’s familiar and warm grasp.  
Louise and Cat, knowing that Phil had the situation under control, decided to go back to the panel. They would say that Dan wasn’t feeling great, but he was resting and would hopefully be able to make it to a meet up in a few hours.  
When the panel ended, the girls dashed back to the hangout room to find that Phil was sitting on the couch on his phone, Dan’s head resting in his lap. Dan’s eyes were closed, though this time peacefully, in a deep sleep.  
“Is he alright?” Louise asked Phil. The british man looked up from his phone and smiled at Louise.  
“He’ll be fine,” Phil assured the two of them. “He’s had a few of these before, this one wasn’t the worst.”  
“How did you get him to calm down?” Cat asked.  
Phil shrugged. “I’m honestly not entirely sure. I just talk to him usually, remind him of where he is, that he’s safe. If that doesn’t work completely then I hold him like his mother used to when he got panic attacks as a kid. I know it’s silly, but it works.”  
“It’s not silly at all,” Cat responded. “Dan’s lucky to have you as a best friend.”  
Phil didn’t respond. Instead, he smiled slightly and ran a hand through Dan’s hair. Louise and Cat took this moment to bow out quickly, hurrying through the doors towards their meetups. Neither one spoke, but they were both thinking the same thing.  
Just how lucky Dan and Phil were to have found each other.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading this one-shot! I wrote it pretty quickly but I'm happy with it. Also, I apologize if the panic attack isn't described correctly. I've had the luck of never experiencing one myself so I had to do some research.


End file.
